成人英语笑话及翻译

注:这些笑话载自www.jokes4all.net 看着觉得好笑就把它们载过来并进行翻译一下,顺便练下翻译,呵呵
[1]
10% of the women had sex within the first hour of their first date.20% of the men had sex in a non-traditional place.36% of the women favour nudity.45% of the women prefer dark men with blue eyes.46% of the women experienced anal sex.
70% of the women prefer sex in the morning.80% of the men have never experienced homosexual relations.90% of the women would like to have sex in the forest.99% of the women have never experienced sex in the office.
Conclusion:
Statistically speaking, you have a better chance of having anal sex in the morning with a strange woman in the forest than to have sex in the office at the end of the day.
Moral:
Do not stay late in the office. Nothing good will ever come of it!10%的女性会在第一次约会里一小时做爱。20%男人有过在一非传统的地方做爱。36%的女性喜欢裸体。45%的女性喜欢蓝色眼珠皮肤暗黑的男人46%的女性有过肛交经历70%女性喜欢清晨做爱80%的男性从来没有过同性性关系经验。90%的女性喜欢在森林里做爱。99%的女性从来没有过办公室做爱的经历。
结论
数据说明，你最好尝试一下在早上的森林里与一个看去去怪怪的女人做爱，而不是在每一天黄昏时在办公室做爱。
不要在办公室待太晚。绝不会有什么好事发生的。
[2] Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"
The next day, Little Johnny got home from school and saw his mom lying on the bed naked with a naked guy on top of her. So Little Johnny ran to his room, stripped down naked, and started to touch himself, while moaning, "Ooh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"

小约翰一天从学校回家，经过妈妈的房间。门开着，他向内看了下发现他妈妈赤裸着身子躺在床上呻吟，一边摸自己一边说：噢，我要一个男人，我要一个男人！第二天，小约翰从学校回家时看见他妈赤裸着身子躺在床上，而另一个裸体男子趴在她身上。于是小约翰马上跑进房间脱掉衣服赤身裸体躺在床上开始自摸，一边呻吟道：噢，我要一辆自行车，我要一辆自行车！
[3]
A wealthy man came home from a gambling trip and told his wife that he had lost their entire fortune and that they'd have to drastically alter their life-style.
"If you'll just learn to cook," he said, "we can fire the chef."
"Okay," she said. "And if you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener."

一富翁从赌博之旅回到家中，告诉他的妻子，他已经失去了他所有的财富。因此，他们的生活将会有个极大的变化。“如果你会下厨的话，那我们可以把厨师给辞了”他说。“好的，”老婆答道，“如果你能够学会如何做爱的话，那我们可以把园丁给辞了。”